Here’s a little background on me. I have degrees in Architecture and civil engineering. I have worked for small architecture firms, global shipping companies, local commercial construction outfits, and international engineering corporations. I like to think I was a decent at my jobs. I could stand my ground against anyone when needed and reach a compromise to benefit both parties. It was not unusual for me to be the only female in the room. That never bothered me. I had always had close male friends and I tended to get along with men very well. I usually think more like a man. I am analytical, enjoy problem solving, tend to try to take the emotion of out major decisions. Don’t get me wrong - I am still a woman but when it came to my career in a male-dominated field, I thought and acted like a man because that’s what I needed to do to succeed. And it came naturally for me. Fast forward to my newest gig. I’m a stay-at-home mom of two girls and I love it. But DANG! It’s hard. So, here are my Top 10 Reasons Being a SAHM is the Hardest Job I’ve Ever Had.
10. I NEVER KNOW WHEN MY WORK DAY WILL START
It was easy. I set an alarm. I went to the gym. I showered and dressed for work. Picked up coffee. Drove my commute. Got to work early (because I’m one of those people that hates being late.) And then my work day started. I have no idea when it will start since I’m dealing with two toddlers. NO IDEA!! Maybe one will wake up at 5:30AM, ready to face the day. Maybe both will sleep in until 7AM. No clue. There is no morning planning. There is no guaranteed workout or enjoying a cup of hot coffee. What does HOT coffee even taste like? There’s definitely no shower….just wiping off with a lukewarm washcloth and throwing on some deodorant.
9. I CAN NO LONGER DROP F-BOMBS WHEN APPROPRIATE
Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about. Saying “Phooey” or “freaking” or “Shoot!” just doesn’t cut it sometimes. I don’t want my kids to learn bad language and those little sponges soak up every word that comes out of my mouth, so I rein it in….as best as I can.
8. I CAN NO LONGER HAVE LUNCH ALONE
Most days I ate lunch in my office but when it was a bad day and I couldn’t take another second of the BS, I would leave and treat myself to a nice lunch. I would get in my car, crank up my music, head to wherever I wanted, and eat a decent meal ALONE. Now, most days, I don’t even eat lunch. I eat whatever is left on my kids’ plates as long as they haven’t funked it up too much and soak up the giggles and cries and complaints about the food I've put before them.
7. IF I BROUGHT IN LUNCH - PEOPLE ATE IT
Feeding kids has got to be the hardest thing ever. And they constantly have to eat. It doesn’t matter if I buy food at a restaurant, heat something up out of the freezer, or make an entire homemade meal from scratch - I HAVE NO IDEA IF THEY WILL ACTUALLY EAT IT! Bring in pizza or sandwiches or donuts or homemade cookies into any office or onto any job site and I promise people will eat them. They might even say thank you, too.
6. A HARD HAT AND STEEL TOED BOOTS WERE ACCEPTABLE ATTIRE
Personal Protective Equipment was understood as a necessity. Safety first! My girls are rough! My husband will actually stop playing, go to the bedroom, and put on his cup simply to survive rough housing with his kids. I feel like I need my hard hat and steel-toed boots all day, every day while raising these strong, powerful girls. I have been punched in the eye, hit in the head, had books dropped on my toes, and don’t forget the LEGOs. Good grief! Don’t step on a LEGO!
5. MY CO-WORKERS NEVER QUESTIONED MY APPEARANCE
If they did, they never said anything to me. I remember chopping off over 9 inches of hair and no one said a word. My oldest girly girl won’t let me leave the house without makeup. She tells me if she likes my hair or thinks my hair looks bad. She is always very opinionated about my clothing choices. She’ll even let me know if my belly looks a bit bigger today. She has definitely thickened my skin.
4. I CAN NO LONGER ESCAPE TO THE RESTROOM
If I was ever so mad that my anger was about to erupt into tears (which would seriously tick me off and make the whole angry crying cycle even worse) I could escape to the restroom, enjoy some peace and quiet, and pull myself together. These days I can’t even pee alone, much less close the door and take a breather.
3. OCCASIONALLY, I WON AN ARGUMENT
When it comes to winning an argument with a toddler, you never win. You don’t! You might think you’ve won the battle for yet another snack but I guarantee when that little darling hits you up for an animal cookie for the 6000th time you’re going to give in. On the job site, I could win an argument.
2. THERE IS NO CONTRACT
On the job site, everyone knew the rules, the expectations, the goals, the plans, the requirements. It was all written down and all parties had signed it. Someone decided to not hold up his end of the bargain - whip out the contract! BAM! Problem solved. Everyone must follow the contract. Toddlers? No contract! I can set the rules and the expectations and the goals and the plans and the requirements. Heck - I could even write them down if I felt that would make me feel better but I’ll be the only one to sign the contract and the only one to follow it. Toddler temper tantrums and meltdowns and fussiness can not be controlled with a piece of paper.
- NO CO-WORKER EVER PEED, POOPED, OR PUKED ON ME
No. Explanation. Needed.
And there you have it. That’s only ten of the reasons being a stay-at-home mom is the hardest gig I’ve ever had. But, IT’S THE MOST AWESOME JOB I’VE EVER HAD, TOO! These girls are my world and I can’t imagine not having them punch me in the eye, beg me for snacks immediately after breakfast, wake me up after only 4 hours of sleep, pee on me, sneeze on me, and steal my lunch right off my plate (even though the exact same food is on their plate.) Their slobbery kisses and tiny hugs and loud giggles and screams of “I wuv you, Mama!” are better than any paycheck I’ve ever received.